Crazy Bubba Podcast: Episode 2

Thanks for tuning into The Crazy Bubba Podcast:

I want to introduce you to my family:

Grand Pa Dipweed, Grand Ma Dipweed, my grand parents.  Then there’s my Mammy and Pappy Dipweed. My Brothers and Sisters, Bubbet Dipweep, Righty tighty and lefty lucy (My Siamese twin sisters) One body with 2 heads.  My older brother Jake and my younger brother “Puddin.”  We call him puddin because his skull never closed up on top and the top of his head is soft, just like puddin.

One day my mammy took off and was gone for 36 months, when she came back, she brought our new half sister “Shenaynay”  (She don’t look like the rest of us).

Our Family Reunion Trip

Mexican Food

All you can eat Mexican food, if you dare.

I want to tell you about the time my brothers and sisters were traveling across the country, on our way to the Dipweed family reunion.  We were running late because the twins was fussing and fighting and we had to stop and let them fight it out.

We stopped at an all-you-can-eat Mexican food/gas station and we had a heaping helping of Mexican food. Puddin was the only one who ate the Mystery Enchiladas made out of goat tripe.  It looked ok, but didn’t smell right to me.

We got back into the van and Jake was driving.  He said we were going to make up time by driving straight through, no more stops.  About that time Puddin’s stomach started gurgling and rumbling.  He started moaning and groaning.  He said he needed to go to the bathroom, but Jake said “NO.”   You’re just going to have to hold it until we get to the Motel 6, which was 4 more hours away.

Puddin started complaining about his stomach and every time we hit a bump in the road, his belly started rumbling.  It sounded like water starting to boil.  I had a suspicion that this wasn’t going to end good.

Puddin said that if we didn’t stop, he was going to shit his pants, but Jake said “We’re not stopping so just put a cork in it, and cross your legs.”  Puddin started moaning, crying, yelling, and turned a lite shade of green.

We finally got to the Motel 6 and before we could even park, Puddin flung open the door and start hopping toward the Motel 6.  He looked like he was a one-legged man in a sack hop race.  He couldn’t uncross his legs because he knew he would explode, so he had to keep them crossed and he was hopping toward the Motel 6 lobby.

Yellow Tape

This restroom is close until further notice.

Pudding hit the lobby and yelled “Get out of my way.”  He ran into the bathroom and into the first stall.  He flung open the toilet seat, and spun around, uncrossed his legs and yanked down his pants.  Before his ass even hit the toilet, a fire hose of dodo-soup shit came blasting out of his ass.  But here’s the problem, he fling open the toilet lid so hard that it hit the backstop, and slammed shut again.  Puddin was unaware of the situation. and had no control over his body anyway. (Houston we have a problem.) It was one of those Kodak moments.  His shit/dodo-soup came out as a very high-speed and hit that flat surface top of the commode lid and exploded in all directions.  It was like shit-fireworks!  there was even shit on the ceiling!  It was so bad that the fire department was called out, and they had to completely close the bathroom with yellow tape.

The hotel manager said that this was the worst bathroom he had ever seen, and he’s been a hotel manager for 33 years.  They had to call in a special team of cleaners who wore white Hazmat suites with full head-gear with a breathing apparatus. The local TV station came out and reported the situation.

The fireman had to take Puddin around back and they hosed him off.

In this episode we are also talking about:

 South African doctors perform world’s first penis transplant

Watch: Three-alarm fire at extinguisher factory

Police Impersonator Who Pulled Over Real Cop Gets Probation

Taiwan: controversial plan to open sex park

Taiwan: controversial plan to open sex park

TAIWAN, are you getting a new sex theme park or just teasing us?

Sex Land

A giant doll outside Love Land, billed as China’s first-ever sex theme park. The park featured giant genitalia and a sex-technique workshop but was torn down in 2009 (before it even opened) after officials said it had an evil influence on society.

The word on the street — or on the internet at least — is that plans are afoot to develop an erotic entertainment attraction on the island’s Southwest Coast National Scenic Area.

After interest was aroused by details posted on the region’s official website, however, the page was quickly taken down.

The park’s administration director, Cheng Rong-fong, confirmed with CNN that the proposal is real, but he insists it’s just a concept at this point.

“The ideal plan is to realise the proposal within this year if we can gain support from the local government,” said Cheng.

Details of the plan, circulated by a user on Taiwan’s popular PTT online bulletin board, outlined a “Taiwan Romantic Boulevard” sightseeing route with four zones stretching across three counties.

Each stage has a different theme: “dating paradise,” “scenic spot for wedding gowns,” “silk road of love” and a proposed 10,000-meter-square “sex theme park.”

The sex theme park — or “Garden of Eden” as it’s called in the proposal — will be modelled after other erotic parks around the world including Jeju’s Loveland in South Korea and Vigeland Park in Oslo, Norway.

Claiming to be educational, the park will serve as the final stop of the four-stage journey of love.

It’ll be divided into different sections, covering topics including sex positions, unusual sex lives and sex toys.

“The dating paradise is perfect for those who are more than friends but aren’t officially a couple yet,” the proposal said.

Cheng said that the proposal shouldn’t have been made public before being finalised, but insisted, if realised, that it will help regenerate a neglected area.

“The south-western coast of Taiwan has been an important salt farm since the Qing Dynasty,” he says.

“It has a unique background, culture and ecological value. Yet, a decade after it was declared a national scenic area, it still hasn’t received much attention from tourists. So we thought to ourselves, is it time to try a new mode of thinking?

“The white powdery salt hill and salt farm have always emitted a romantic feeling for visitors coming to the area,” said Cheng. “That’s why we came up with the idea to be the first dating/wedding-themed park in Taiwan.”

via Taiwan: controversial plan to open sex park.

Bubba’s comments

This sounds like a great idea. I wonder if they will have rides like “The big penis slide”, or the “bouncy titty bumper cars.”   I’d pay to visit that park. I assume it’s adult only. So why doesn’t America ever think about things like this.?

Police Impersonator Who Pulled Over Real Cop Gets Probation – ABC News

Police Impersonator Who Pulled Over Real Cop Gets Probation

AKRON, Ohio — Mar 20, 2015, 1:38 PM ET

Cop CarAn Ohio man who pulled over a detective while impersonating a police officer has been sentenced to 18 months of probation and ordered to undergo a mental health evaluation.

Fifty-year-old David Scofield, of Lancaster, was sentenced Thursday in Akron. A judge fined him $1,000 and ordered that all contents seized from his car, including a gun and law enforcement paraphernalia, be destroyed.

Scofield was arrested Oct. 13 after a detective said Scofield shined a spotlight into his car and swerved in front of him on Interstate 76 outside Akron.

Scofield pleaded no contest last month to misdemeanor charges of impersonating a police officer, mishandling a firearm and obstructing official business.

His attorney said Friday he’s pleased his client avoided jail.

via Police Impersonator Who Pulled Over Real Cop Gets Probation – ABC News.

Bubba’s Comments

Friends, if you are going to pretend to be a police man, I would recommend not pulling real cops over. I just wonder how many other people this nut has pulled over.  Maybe we was just making a little bribe money on the side.  Anyway, now he get to ride in a real cop car, all the way to jail.

Watch: Three-alarm fire at extinguisher factory –

Fire ExtinguisherCHICAGO, March 20 (UPI) — More than 150 Chicago firefighters were called to fight flames at a building housing one of the department’s closest allies — a fire extinguisher factory.

Chicago Fire Department officials said the building in the Archer Heights neighborhood on the southwest side of the city ignited Thursday night and the fire worsened to three alarms about 9:30 p.m., leading to a total 156 firefighters responding with 26 pieces of equipment.

A portion of the building, which firefighters said housed a fire extinguisher manufacturing business, collapsed as a result of the intense fire, the department said.

First Deputy Fire Commissioner Charles Stewart III said the nature of the blaze made it difficult to reach the flames with water.

“We had one engine feed another engine to another engine until we got water on the fire,” he told WMAQ-TV.

Firefighters said no injuries were reported and the cause of the fire remained under investigation Friday.

via Watch: Three-alarm fire at extinguisher factory –

Bubba’s Comments:

This would be the last place I’d expect a fire.  This would be like someone breaking into a prison. I am assuming this fire started at night when no one was there, otherwise you would think that someone would find a fire extinguisher.

I wonder what the insurance company is going to say about this? How in the hell does a fire extinguisher business burn down.  This sounds like a comedy movie.